As society evolves and progresses away from the old systems of oppression, separatism and elitism, more and more we are becoming aware of the subtleties of the dynamics between 2 people that are participating in a traditional (legal marriage) relationship, or in a non-traditional (domestic partnership) relationship, or in an alternative (open or FWB) relationship or in any other type of relationship 2 people can enter into that involves emotions, intimacy and trust.

Toxic Masculinity is the Topic of the Times and has been picked apart from every conceivable angle. It refers to the notion that some people’s ideas of being a man or “manliness” promotes and perpetuates dominance, aggression and homophobia. It revolves around cultural pressures for men to act and react in certain ways. Boys are taught to be “tough” and to not show emotions and it has a detrimental effect on every male. Let us examine some very recognizable Toxic Masculinity Traits:

 Financial Control even if he is not the Main Breadwinner
 He must approve any and everything you do before you can proceed to the next step
 He has Frequent and Escalating Outbursts of Anger
 He forcefully hangs on to the preconceived gender roles
 He forces his opinions and desires upon you
 He never accepts that he is wrong
 He tries to shut you out of your other relationships

From being apathetic, unemotional and power-hungry all the way to being narcissistic and violent, men are still defined by these outdated and ridiculous stereotypes, which have created and perpetuated unhealthy and unrealistic innerstanding of what being a man means in today’s society. We can see the damage that comes from the assumption that men are the protectors, providers, breadwinners or leaders, or associating men with anger, selfishness and aggression. Any of these assumptions can be very problematic and damaging. These assumptions are based upon unproven biases that we as individuals, and as society as a whole, believe, support and encourage. These assumptions are perpetuated upon boys and men as some sort of Rites of Passage. Males are taught to falsely believe and measure up to these assumptions, ultimately harming themselves and others.

Toxic Femininity is the flipside of Toxic Masculinity and hasn’t had the same promotion as the former yet is just as prevalent and devastating. It is a form of internalized misogyny and refers to the notion that females must restrict themselves into stereotypical feminine roles (man-pleasing) in order to attract a male. Girls are taught to be “soft” and that it is okay to show your emotions and it has a deadening effect on most every female. Let us examine some very recognizable Toxic Femininity Traits:

 Displaying Excessive Jealousy
 Being Passive-Aggressive
 Being Emotionally Unavailable
 Manipulating or Controlling Behavior
 Playing the Victim
 Being Overly Critical
 Sabotaging his Self-Esteem
 Refusing to take responsibility for actions
 Using Sex as a Weapon or Tool

Living a life full of fantasy and being told that there are certain things you must do to get and keep a male has been confusing to every female ever born. Having to suppress something in you that is natural goes against the laws of nature and yet society has determined that females can only act and be in preconceived roles that severely limit and restrict the naturalness of every girl evolving into womanhood. Assuming that females are only “soft” and “sensitive” is just as problematic and damaging as the assumptions that are perpetrated upon boys and men. These assumptions are based upon unproven biases that we as individuals, and as society as a whole, believe, support and encourage. These assumptions are perpetuated upon girls and women as some sort of exact blueprint or guided roadmap to relationship success. Females are taught to falsely believe and measure up to these assumptions, ultimately harming themselves and others.

Individually, we must be able to accept and admit that we each have some negative thought, decision-making and behavior patterns before we can move forward in the processing through, and the releasing of, and the reassigning or reversing of these patterns, in order for True Healing to begin. Once we can come to this point of admittance, our awareness of self and of our own behaviors will become much more apparent and illuminate the areas that we each still need to do some work in. This Shadow Work is the True Step of Accountability.

I AM Permanently Resolving, Releasing and Reversing all of my Past Toxic Relationship Dependency Appetites, Dysfunctional Behaviors, Delusional Beliefs and Destructive Attitudes that I have repeated in every relationship I have participated in, and all of my Past Toxic Relationship Physical, Mental, Emotional and Sexual Abuse, Experiences and Drama I willingly and unwillingly participated in with Cheryl Lynn Allen, and Yolanda Rene Coates, and with Maetta Williams, and with Rochelle L. Flowers, and with Tammie Evell Martin, and with Dionne Partre Meadows, and with Tameeka Latrice Wyndon during this incarnation and I reassign them back to every unauthentic version of Mark Edward Pyle that no longer exists on this plane, that participated in each relationship and then back to the Void.